Friday, August 26, 2011

Genius anesthesia quotes

Our dear friend Elle from Spill the Beans is a clumsy mess.  Luckily for us, she was willing to share her MANY injury stories.  Here is just one, but you simply must go to her blog.  You'll be glad you did.

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Things I Said While Under the Influence of Anesthesia

Hi! *waving with left hand* Last week, I had surgery on my right shoulder. For your amusement, here are some things I said/blurted out while under Twilight Anesthesia:
-When asked to move from the bed to the table in the OR, I proudly announced that “I’m a very good scoocher!” Not sure where that came from.
-Once I was settled in and my arms were restrained, “Great, now my nose itches.” One of the nurses came over and rubbed it for me. When asked if that was better, I replied, “I guess but please rub it one more time just to be sure.” At least I was polite.
-According to my doctor, I asked a lot of questions throughout the rest of the surgery. “What are you doing? Why are you doing that?” etc. I’m sure he loved that.
-Felt it necessary to again announce how awesome I am at scooching when surgery was over and I was being moved from the table to a bed. “Why are you moving me? I am a good scoocher, remember?” “Yes Elle, we remember but you can’t use one of your arms now.” Well that just sucks. It was my last chance to prove my awesomeness at scooching and my right arm had to go and be all immobilized. Slacker.
-And finally, when being wheeled out of the OR and into recovery I complained, rather emphatically, that “My bracelets do not match!” Referring to my medical bracelets; one was red, the other was blue, white and yellow. I was assured it would be alright. They just don’t understand.
I also announced in recovery that I felt great! Not nauseous at all! I’d could even go for a latte! A moment later, I threw up. “How does that latte sound now?” One of the nurses asked. Hahaha… sob, gag.
Honestly, I’m surprised they didn’t just opt to put me all the way under so I’d STOP TALKING. I’m sure they were tempted. Also? I still can’t use my right arm. Typing this, took FOREVER. Oh yay, time for my pain med! Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
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Thank you Elle!  We love you!  Link up your other funny traumatic injury stories here please so others can enjoy them.  ;)