Monday, October 10, 2011

Performance Review

Happy Monday Cheesy Bloggers! Miss Sarcasm here with this week's theme, and I really, REALLY hope you like it. I've kinda bombed on my past couple of themes, but lame mediocrity is my specialty, so no surprise there. Hopefully this one will get some guest posts for me. Some good links ups....
ACTUALLY, some smiles and laughs are what I care about the most though, so enjoy!

A few days ago Bossy Girl and I were having a random discussion when she decided to say out of the blue, "Mom, you're a good mommy." So I asked her what makes me a good mommy. She said, "You do all the mom jobs well." So I asked if she meant feeding and clothing them and loving them. She said, "Yes. ALL the mom jobs." I then asked her which "mom jobs" I may not do so well. Bossy Girl said she doesn't like when I yell, but she thinks it's really funny when I swear. So pretty much I figure I just had my mom "performance review" for the year and I passed. I'm a goddamn natural at this motherhood thing. Too bad there's no raise or promotion. Just snot noses, puke catching, diaper blow out cleaning, food cooking, tear drying, hug receiving, pride-filled heart feeling love.

I get evaluated annually for my job, but I've never experienced a typical "performance review" before this one with Bossy Girl. Which made me think that for this week, let's focus on performance reviews. Have you had one for your job that was stellar? One that was terrible? One that cracked you up and made no sense? Like some of these I found:

  • This person is not really so much of a has-been, but more definitely a won't-be.
  • To hear him speak, his accomplishments are so big they can only be compared to that of a black hole in space -- unfortunately, neither have been confirmed to exist.
  • Create a new title to make him feel appreciated, e.g., jester, dunce, former employee, etc.
  • Gates are down, lights are flashing, but the train just isn't coming.
  • A clock watcher who's in a different time zone than the rest of us.
  • He's so dense, light bends around him.
  • This employee should go far -- and the sooner he starts, the better.
  • He sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them.
  • Got into the gene pool when the lifeguard wasn't looking.
  • Is still able to get the job done -- if someone else helps.

  • source:

    Have you ever had to write a performance review of someone? Is there anyone in your life or neighborhood you'd like evaluate and write a review of? A product or celebrity that needs a good performance review? Have fun with us and share your performance review! I know I'm going to write a "performance review" on my female reproductive organs over at my other blog and link it up this week. Let me tell you, this review is gonna be a doozy and someone's getting fired.  I'm talking to you, uterus. 

    You're welcome to either link up below or email us at to be a guest poster for the week! Also, don't forget to check out our Spreadable Cheese page for some fun performance review bits.