Question 1: When was the last time you bought something fun and exciting FOR YOURSELF that cost more than 100 bucks?
A - When I was a teenager working at Blockbuster.
B - When my parents gave me $100 bucks from their latest bingo winnings.
C - Last week, and it wasn't even just alcohol.
A - Um, what is a shower?
B - The last time my husband/kids left me alone for one goddam day.
C - I do this a lot, it's the only way I CAN GET THE EFF AWAY FROM THEM.
Question 3: When was the last time you got dressed up, went out with friends, and drank and laughed and came home late?
A - When I turned drinking age, or at my bachelorette party.
B - At my last birthday.
C - Last week because I finally got a babysitter and managed not to pass out at 8pm.
Question 4: When was the last time sex was for YOU?
A - Not applicable, I don't like sex.
B - Sometime this year I think.
C - It wasn't that long ago and I remember it clearly - i.e., I wasn't even that drunk.
Question 5: Have you ever taken a few minutes to enrich YOUR life today?
A - Does playing with my kids count?
B - I got a pedicure last month.
C - I rest for a least a few minutes each day. A few deep breaths, some yoga, the gym, a book, some writing, etc.
Marianna’s Total Score:
Fuck. I need a calculator. Hold on….. 782.3 I’m figuring high points are good. SO YOU WIN! Unless my point total is better. Which would be WAY more awesome.
Miss Sarcasm’s Total Score:
171 points. Even though I made up the numbers in a totally random fashion, I say that’s pretty darn good!
Ang’s Total Score:
296 well-earned points! Excellent score. Buy yourself something fun/pretty though. SOON. And you should know by now how important it is to listen to me. I am a genius, afterall.